Life After Death
by Evilerk
Summary: In the comics, Logan became Death when Apocalypse reigned. Dealing with the aftermath of it wasn’t easy unless someone helped him.


**Author :** Evilerk   
**Archives: **WRFA, DH   
**Notes :** I actually wrote this as a Wolverine/Jubes story but I think Rogue ahem fits better. Um...and I've made Jean not so bitchy…oO Oh, and once again I would like to thank my Witchy-poo for ahem helping out..

* * *

**LIFE AFTER DEATH**

The alarm was loud enough in the daytime, but at 3 am it was unbearably loud as it echoed through the halls of the school.

"If it's Magneto, tell him to attack at a more reasonable hour." Jean's voice was muffled as she plopped the pillow over her face in irritation.

"Come on, Jean, this could be serious." Scott urged her as he clamped on his visor.

She sighed, throwing the soft pillow to the floor. Even with telekinesis, when she was this groggy, nothing would be able to get her out of bed. She turned to her side, still insistent at continuing her sleep.

"Jean!" Apparently the fearless leader of a husband wasn't going to let her have that sleep.

"Ok ok." A grumble from her. She forced her legs out of the covers but stopped short when she saw him. Her eyes narrowed and a grin soon appeared on her sleepy face.

"Seems someone wears his uniform to bed."

"Now, don't you -- " But her husband's retorts were suddenly interrupted by a familiar telepathic presence.

Everyone, remain calm. It's a false alarm. My sincere apologies. You can go back to sleep.

The mansion stood silence once again, leaving only the sigh of relief from every X-Man as they returned to their sleep. However, Scott didn't share the same sentiment. He was suspicious.

"False alarm? The Professor?"

Jean was just as surprised. Mentally, she asked the same question to her mentor. She felt the hesitance in his reply.

Yes, Jean. It would appear that Logan in his current state, tripped the alarm.

A deep frown was the response from her. He must really be troubled! Her concern was heavy for a fellow team-mate in need of help. I should go -- She got up immediately.

Already taken care of, Jean, you shouldn't worry. Try to get some sleep. We have a big day tomorrow.

With that, the telepathic contact broke. Yet Jean stood silent, lost in her thoughts.

"Jean, what's wrong? Jean?" A soft touch on her shoulder. But it was the softer look from the man she loved that remind her this man was her main concern too. The worried on his face too only confirmed that. She took the hand and entwined her fingers in his.

Then, softly, she spoke, "The Professor said it was Logan. He set off the alarm and -- "

"And you thought you go help him?" Scott replied coldly. "I knew it! What does he think this is? A game? I'm going to kill him."

"Scott, no!" She grasped his hand tighter, forcing him to remain in the room. "Let it go. You know it's not easy on him. On any of us. It's not his fault."

He remained silent but having a telepath as a wife wasn't easy. He hadn't realized his thoughts were projected. His damn fault for not trying out my new battle plan! All this crap wouldn't have happened if --

"Scott, let it go." It was a soft, sultry plea from her. He wouldn't really fall for it. But with that even softer, glazed look from her, he finally relented.

"Fine!" He zipped out of his uniform. Not caring what was underneath it, he climbed back to bed. "You coming?" A glance over his shoulder as he realized Jean was still not moving from her spot.

She knew he was asking her to heal his hurt pride. Often he would ask to be kissed, wanting her to make him feel like a man again. But she caught a strong thought. Her eyes fell on a distant figure outside the window. "I'll be right over. I'm just gonna open the window a little."

She pushed the glass panes forward, causing a sudden rush of cool air. She breathed in deeply because the thought was full of pain. It was coming from that figure. It was a figure near a lake. A dark figure, hunched and sitting on the edge of the pier. Alone.

"Logan." She whispered. She wanted to help him. She had felt the hurt and torment of his mind ever since that terrible day. A mere memory now but she knew Logan hadn't taken it in stride. She knew he grieved at how he had nearly killed his own teammates.

The desire to help was great so it urged her to go to him now. Yet she remained still, only watching her friend, because there was another figure walking towards him.

* * *

"Hey, sugah. Thanks for the wake-up call." 

It was a voice he knew. One he would usually acknowledge with a grunt or just another "Hey, darlin' ". But he didn't feel like talking now. He just stared out over the water. He wanted to be left alone.

Rogue settled herself beside him. This time she tried a little more seriously. "Want to talk about it?"

She tilted her head, beckoning his eyes to meet hers, trying to find a hint of the Logan she knew and loved. But when those eyes met hers for a few short seconds, it frightened her. There was so much pain in them. The glare pierced through her. She had to look away.

"Ah mean --" Her southern accent slipped without her wanting to. "I mean, you're back with us now and everything." She turned to him again, somewhat relieved he had turned away. But she needed to reassure him because she felt the pain for him.

"It's gonna be alright, Logan." She braved herself to touch him, squeezing his hand with her own gloved one as a glimmer of hope shone in her eyes.

But he pulled back suddenly with a snarl. "HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?!"

The moment the sentence finished, he regreted it. Damn her and those brown eyes of hers!

"I'm sorry. " A shaky hand went through his already messy hair. "I didn't mean it like that."

He couldn't look at her. After what he did to her, when he was so lost, when he was not himself, when he was Death, how can she even look at him, even care for him now?

"How is it ever going to be ok? I lost myself. I attacked you. Remember?!" A growl escaped his lips. Oh God! He didn't want to remember that day, that terrible day that he fought her with a sword. A freaking sword! Not once did she retaliate or beat the shit out of him when she could. What was even worse was that he knew what was going on and yet he couldn't stop.

"I attacked everyone! I could have killed Scott, Hank, even Jean! I could have killed -- " The words wouldn't come out as his body shook hard at the frightening possibility.

She drew near, embracing him without fear. She whispered, "Listen, sugah, that wasn't you. You were being controlled. It wasn't your fault." She leaned into him "It wasn't."

It wasn't easy for Logan, she knew. Neither was it easy for her to try to convince him. Who was she to tell him all that? The pain he felt must be more than she even knew. Yet she couldn't stand the man she admired, respected and even love be in such misery.

A tear slid down her cheek.

"Marie." He leaned back, breaking her hold on him. He wanted to see her. "You know, the worse fear was losing myself in a berserker rage." His voice thick and hoarse. " Lose myself and hurt someone I care about . Someone -- someone I ..." He didn't dare finish it. He didn't even know if he was worth having that.

"Love?"

Yet she finished his sentence correctly. He couldn't look at her but merely nodded.

"Do you know why I came back? Return to the mansion before any of this shit happened?" He spoke softly, still not looking.

She shook her head.

"I got a letter from one of your friends." He paused as though remembering. "The really annoying one." A soft growl slipped. "Told me how you were close to controlling your powers. I thought we, um, what I mean is that, that is to say, I came back to see how you were doing. I missed you, darlin'."

This time it was he who embraced her. He did miss her. Of all the times alone on the roads, he thought about her, not of his past, not of Jean but her.

"I missed you." He wasn't aware he whispered it close to her ear. For a moment he lost himself in her soft hair and sweet scent.

"Missed you too, Logan." She pulled away from him to let him see her smiling. But a little blush slipped with her smile.

But he didn't let go of her just yet. Instead he looked at her, his face only an inch away from her. He wanted to tell her. He had wanted to tell her way before he was turned to some shithead with a sword.

"I got back --." His voice croaked, trying to find the words. "I got back and saw you kissing some red-eyed pansy." He let out a low growl at the memory. "I sure don't remember a lot of my past but seeing you two together… Shit, Marie, it was the worst pain ever!"

The anguish he was telling her now made her tears fall again.

"Next thing I know, I'm back in another lab being turned it to a real fucking monster by some ass with a giant A on his belt buckle!" The growl grew fiercer this time but the soft silence from her quietened him immediately.

"I came back to say I'm sorry, Marie. Sorry for leaving you, sorry for attacking you. Hell, I'm even sorry for dragging your cute little ass out here at 3am listening to me ramble on when there are better people you could be spending your time with."

The words made her laugh despite her tears. 'Cute' wasn't a word the Wolverine should be using. Especially when it was referring to her ass.

"Logan, will you just hush? First of all, you don't have to say you're sorry. You were there for me. You saved my life many times. I will always be there for you as well as the other X-men." She caressed his cheek softly, feeling his bristles prickling her gloves. Not once was she aware he was holding her even tighter.

"Second, you should also know by now that there is no one else I would rather be with at 3am then you." The pink on her cheeks grew even darker.

But as warm as her cheeks were, she noticed that Logan was starting to blush too.

"What's this? The mighty Wolvie blushing?!" She willingly laughed at him, not afraid at all even when she knew he didn't take well to teasing.

But instead, he whispered, "But I thought you and Gumbo -- "

"Hold it right there, sugah! Gumbo, I mean, Gambit stole a kiss from me and if you had hung around long enough, you would've seen him going through a wall afterwards. It was a prank, Logan. Both he and Kitty were in it."

The sigh of relief from him actually made Rogue giggled.

"Well, darlin', you can't imagine how good it is to hear you say that because I really love you -- " It slipped before he could stop himself. He growled inwardly to himself for letting his guard down. He was the Wolverine, damn it! The bad ass!

Yet something had changed him. Sure, the whole matter about being Death struck him deep, tormented him and changed him. But since that incident, it changed him even more, made him realized, somewhere along the way, this once scared little girl he picked up in that bar had become the strong, confident woman which he now loved with all his heart. To be Death, it told and even taught him that he could have lost her and never tell her his feelings. He wasn't going to let that happened. Ever.

"Marie." He trailed a calloused finger on her cheek.

And he knew she felt the same way about him. She didn't have to say it. By the sudden skip of her heart, the change in her breathing, and that subtle scent about her now, he knew. He smiled knowingly.

"Logan." But it was that sweet voice that urged him to do more to her than just look at her now.

He kissed her.

Those lips! Oh hell, those lips made him yearned more for her! He slipped a hand onto her breast as he slid his tongue against her own.

"Logan…" But she broke the kiss, breathing heavy on him. Yet Logan refused to let go of his embrace on her.

"What?" His own breaths harsh on her.

She frowned.

"What's wrong? Is it your control?" Worry ladened his words as he held her tighter. He knew she was still getting a hang of her mutation. He knew how difficult it was for her to focus. Maybe he should stop before it got too much.

"No. My control's fine, sugah."

"But the gloves, darlin' –" He brought her hands to his lips, kissing them, loving how small they were, enclasped in his.

"Cold night." A grin to satisfy a simple reply.

But on his part, he wasn't amused. "Then why did you stop me?" He leaned forward, wanting to claim her lips again.

"I wanted to tell you something." A shy smile on her face. "That I love you too, Logan. For a while now. Wanted to tell you before any of those bad things happened to you. Wanted -- "

He didn't let her finish because his lips were soon pressed hard against her, muffling all words that she wanted to say, words that he already knew.

* * *

Jean stood shocked, having witnessed all of it. She couldn't hear for they were too far away. Yet she caught on the exchange of thoughts laced with love for each other. 

Jean?

But there was another thought embracing her own now, laced with an old feeling of love too.

It's Rogue and Logan, honey. She needn't explain that thought any further.

"Lucky girl." A whisper from her husband as he came up behind her. He kissed her cheek. "But you'll be luckier if you come to bed with me."

She turned to him, smiling. "They do make an interesting couple." She leaned against him, turning back to the couple.

He followed her gaze, seeing the couple still entwined in each other, oblivious to the world but themselves. If she could have seen his eyes, Jean knew he was squinting far too hard to see the couple.

"Oh God, did Rogue just put her hand on -- " And apparently, he had seen something he shouldn't have.

"Come on, honey. Back to bed."

**The End**

©2004, Evilerk, h t t p : burn.at / atouchofevil


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